Being a working mum is no walk in the park. Between managing your career, keeping the household running, and being there for your family, your needs often fall to the bottom of the priority list. And just when you think you’ve found a rhythm, the teenage years arrive and turn everything upside down.
Your once-adoring child suddenly seems like a stranger. One day they’re slamming doors, the next they’re rolling their eyes at every word you say. They spend more time with their friends, rarely open up to you, and you feel a growing distance you never anticipated. It’s heartbreaking. And it’s completely normal.
Understanding the Teenage Transition
The teen years are a whirlwind of change. Physically, emotionally, socially, and neurologically, they’re navigating more than they can often articulate. Their brains are still developing, especially the parts responsible for decision-making and impulse control. This leads to mood swings, risk-taking, and behaviour that might seem irrational or confrontational.
Puberty can also take a toll on their self-esteem and body image. Friendships and romantic interests become central to their world as they explore independence and identity. Add to that their heightened sensitivity to peer pressure, and it’s no wonder teens often seem at odds with their parents.
But here’s the thing: while their behaviour may be challenging, it doesn’t mean you’ve failed as a parent. It’s part of their growth.
When Teen Behaviour Spills into Work Life
As a working mum, these teenage challenges can follow you into the office. Maybe you’re distracted after a heated argument in the morning or worried about your teen’s choices. If their struggles escalate—like refusing to attend school or dealing with overwhelming emotions—you might even need to take time off.
Suddenly, your professional life feels the ripple effects. Your focus dips, stress levels soar, and the balance you worked so hard to maintain starts to wobble. But it doesn’t have to stay this way.
Practical Steps to Reclaim Balance
Here’s the good news: you can make positive changes for yourself, your teen, and your work life. By taking small but impactful steps, you can create a more harmonious home and a thriving professional environment.
For Yourself
Prioritise Self-Care
It’s easy to push self-care aside, but taking time for yourself isn’t selfish—it’s essential. Whether it’s exercise, meditation, or simply a quiet cup of tea, find what rejuvenates you and make it a habit. A well-cared-for you is a better mum, partner, and professional.
Audit Your Time
Take a close look at how you’re spending your days. Are your activities aligning with your values? Make space for the things that matter most—whether it’s attending your teen’s game or setting aside quality time for yourself.
Delegate Tasks
Lighten your load by involving others. Share household responsibilities, hire help for chores, or simplify meal prep with healthy delivery options. Even one less task can make a world of difference.
Find Your Support Network
Connect with other parents of teens. Parenting groups, whether online or in person, can provide emotional support, practical advice, and a reminder that you’re not alone in this journey.
Seek Professional Support
There’s no shame in asking for help. Whether it’s a parenting coach, counsellor, or other expert, the right guidance can provide you with tools and strategies to navigate challenges more effectively.
For Your Teen
Connect with Their Emerging Identity
Get to know who your teen is becoming as an individual. Respect their opinions, even when they differ from yours, and approach them with curiosity rather than judgment.
Educate Yourself on Teen Development
Understanding the biological and emotional changes your teen is experiencing can help you respond with empathy instead of frustration.
Empower Them with Knowledge
Help your teen make sense of their own feelings and changes. When they can identify their needs, they’re less likely to act out in confusion or overwhelm.
Foster Independence
Give your teen a say in rules, responsibilities, and consequences. Treat them like the young adult they’re becoming, and you’ll see them rise to the occasion.
Teach Life Skills
Equip your teen with practical tools like budgeting, cooking, and conflict resolution. These skills not only prepare them for adulthood but also boost their confidence and reduce your stress.
Collaborate with Their School
Build a partnership with their teachers or school counsellors. A united approach can make a significant difference in managing any behavioural or academic concerns.
Encourage Professional Support
If your teen needs extra help, don’t hesitate to involve a therapist or mentor. Sometimes, they’re more comfortable opening up to someone outside the family.
For Work
Set Clear Boundaries
Protect your focus and wellbeing by establishing limits around work hours or interruptions. Clear boundaries help you feel more in control and reduce stress.
Create Transition Rituals
Use your commute or a short routine to decompress between work and home life. Whether it’s listening to music or calling a friend, these rituals can help you shift gears more smoothly.
Delegate or Streamline Workload
Identify tasks that can be handed off or delayed. Lightening your professional load temporarily can make it easier to focus on resolving challenges at home.
Communicate with Your Team
Let your manager or trusted colleagues know if you’re going through a tough time. Their understanding can create a supportive work environment while you navigate personal challenges.
Ask for Flexibility
Don’t hesitate to request adjustments like flexible hours or remote work if it helps you manage both your family and career more effectively.
Thriving at Work and Home
You don’t have to choose between being a great mum and a successful professional. With a deeper understanding of your teen’s world and a few practical adjustments, you can thrive in both spaces. Embrace the journey, take care of yourself, and trust that even the most turbulent teen years will pass.
You’ve got this, and you’re not alone!
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